Don't Click This

Achievement  You can do anything you set your mind to when you have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor.		Adversity  That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.		Ambition  The journey of a thousand miles sometimes ends very, very badly
Arrogance  The best leaders inspire by example. When that's not an option, brute intimidation works pretty well, too.		Beauty  If you're attractive enough on the outside, people will forgive you for being irritating to the core.		Bitterness  Never be afraid to share your dreams with the world, because there's nothing the world loves more than the taste of really sweet dreams.
Blame  The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.		Burnout  Attitudes are contagious. Mine might kill you.		Change (winds)  When the winds of change blow hard enough, the most trivial of things can become deadly projectiles.
Cluelessness  There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots.		Compromise  Let's agree to respect each others views, no matter how wrong yours may be		Conformity  When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.
Consistency   It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.		Consulting  If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem.		Customer Care  If we really cared for our customers, we'd send them somewhere better.
Dare to Slack  When birds fly in the right formation, they need only exert half the effort. Even in nature, teamwork results in collective laziness.		Delusions  There is no greater joy than soaring high on the wings of your dreams, except maybe the joy of watching a dreamer who has nowhere to land but in the ocean of reality.		Demotivation  Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people.
Despair   It's always darkest just before it goes pitch black.		Discovery  A company that will go to the ends of the Earth for its people will find it can hire them for about 10% of the cost of Americans.
Disloyalty  There comes a time when every team must learn to make individual sacrifices.		Disservice  It takes months to find a customer, but only seconds to lose one... the good news is that we should run out of them in no time.		Do it Later The early worm is for the birds.
Effort  Hard work never killed anybody, but it is illegal in some places.		Elitism  It's lonely at the top, but it's comforting to look down upon everyone at the bottom.		Fear  Until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore, you will not know the terror of being forever lost at sea
Flattery  If you want to get to the top, prepare to kiss a lot of the bottom.		Get To Work   You aren't being paid to believe in the power of your dreams.		Goals  It's best to avoid standing directly between a competitive jerk and his goals.
Hazards  There is an island of opportunity in the middle of every difficulty. Miss that, though, and you're pretty much doomed.		Humiliation   The harder you try, the dumber you look.		Idiocy  Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
Ignorance  It's amazing how much easier it is for a team to work together when no one has any idea where they're going.		Incompetence  When you earnestly believe you can compensate for a lack of skill by doubling your efforts, there's no end to what you can't do.		Insanity  It's difficult to comprehend how insane some people can be. Especially when you're insane.
Inspiration  Genius is 1 percent inspiration and 99% perspiration, which is why engineers sometimes smell really bad.		Irresponsibility  No single raindrop believes it is to blame for the flood.		Laziness  Success is a journey, not a destination. So stop running.
Loneliness  If you find yourself struggling with loneliness, you're not alone. And yet you are alone. So very alone.		Losing  If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.		Madness  Madness does not always howl. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "Hey, is there room in your head for one more?"
Misfortune  While good fortune often eludes you, this kind never misses.		Overconfidence  Before you attempt to beat the odds, be sure you could survive the odds beating you.
Pretension  The downside of being better than everyone else is that people tend to assume you're pretentious.		Problems  No matter how great and destructive your problems may seem now, remember, you've probably only seen the tip of them		Quality The race for quality has no finish line-so technically, it's more like a death march.
Regret  It hurts to admit when you make mistakes - but when they're big enough, the pain only lasts a second		Risks  If you never try anything new, you'll miss out on many of life's great disappointments.		Sacrifice  Your role may be thankless, but if you're willing to give it your all, you just might bring success to those who outlast you.
Sacrifice (Temple) All we ask here is that you give us your heart.				Trouble  Luck can't last a lifetime unless you die young.
Underachievement  The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the lawnmower.		Wishes When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

 

 

 

 

 

I created almost none of these. The smaller ones at the center were lifted in their entirety from www.despair.com . You can purchase them there as cards or mugs (but sadly not plaques at the time of the lifting.)